Tuesday, December 09, 2008

New Contest: "It's a Sign!"


Howdy, y’all! Wow, after the absolutely overunderwhelming success of our last contest (Name That Thing!), I think it’s time for another one, don’t you think? (sound of one hand clapping)

Hey, I knew you'd see it my way!

Anyhoo, I was walking down the sidewalk the other day (or was I walking ‘up’ the sidewalk? Here in flat ol’ Houston, Texas, I can never tell...) when I noticed the sign you see here.

Now, I realize the trend over the last few decades has been to make road signs such as these as comprehendible compromisable complicappable widely understood, and by as large a segment of the population, as possible. I get that.

But still; sometimes I think we’re goin’ a bit too far towards simplifying these things, y’know?
The problem, as I see it (which of course may explain everything), is we’re gettin’ to the point where what’s left is ‘waaaay too open to interpretation, if you know what I mean. And I know I’m not alone in this. (At least, I hope not!)

Take this sign.

Yes, I’m sure we all realize the intended meaning is “Pedestrian Crossing Ahead”, right? (I know it can’t possibly mean, “Stop for People in Crosswalk”, because nobody actually, y’know, does. But I digress.) However, in my humble opinion, it could also be imbued (which is a fancy way of sayin' stuffed with) with lots of other meanings as well.

For instance, when I see it I immediately think, “Man With Painful Backache Ahead”. (Hey, don't run; I’ve got more...)

So What Do You See?

So just for the fun of it, what would YOU suggest as a new, improved meaning for this sign?

Remember, folks, this is a contest, so that means you’ll have a chance to win one of three valuable prizes!

First Prize: Monogrammed belly-button lint bag

Second Prize: Used apple core, gnawed by Mr. Middle Zone himself (er; that's me)

Third Prize: Photo of my Elvis clock

(Well, actually, we had these prizes left over from our last contest – again, that’s: Name That Thing! – mainly because the hapless victims innocent bystanders lucky winners kept, er, returning ‘em! Go figure.)

Anyway, just leave your suggestions in the trash can out back the comment box! Once we collect enough of 'em (that's code for more than 2), Brad, George and yours truly will get together and randomly choose a victim winner!

So keep those, er, card and/or letter comin', folks!
__________________________

26 comments:

Robyn McMaster said...

Powerwalker whizzing by...

Jackie Cameron said...

Skier and skis coming adrift

Robert Hruzek said...

Robyn - OK; that's one!

Robert Hruzek said...

@Jackie - Y'know, I don't think I saw THAT one coming!

Tumblemoose said...

Somebody! Scratch me bum whilst I look for my feet!

Robert Hruzek said...

I'd like to see ya walk a mile in dogies, George!

Robert Hruzek said...

Gagh. "... in them dogies..."

Luke Gedeon said...

Did you ever pretend, when you were a kid, that you were riding a horse by holding one arm out front to hold the reigns and slapping yourself on the backside (I guess pretending to slap the horse)? I am not sure if I ever did, but I have seen several people do this. Possibly on TV. Anyway that is the first thing I thought of.

Another possibility is that they are instructing people to walk in the middle of the left lane. Notice that the stripe to the walker's right is dashed indicating the middle of the road.

Brad Shorr said...

Slo Pitch Softball Game Ahead

Tabetha said...

It looks to me like he stepped in cement and is trying to pull his legs out. Notice he has no feet...then again, there are no hands either! Well, at least he has a head!!

Tabetha said...

Weeeelllll, I just noticed that his head is not actually attached! I guess he better be careful or he might lose his head!

Brad Shorr said...

Hi Tabetha, Look carefully ... he doesn't actually have a head either. It's floating in space.

Tabetha said...

Ha! I posted before you!! :D

Brad Shorr said...

Tabetha, You got me! I'm too old, too slow, too dim. But hey, at least I still have my feet, hands, and on good days, my head.

Luke Gedeon said...

I think it is a warning not to lose your head whenever you feel footloose and handsy free.

Or maybe you should just follow the yellow-brick road and try not to think outside the box. Of the box is a bit skewed/slanted.

Tabetha said...

True, and I bet none of those are stuck in cement! I say you're doing great!

Brad Shorr said...

Luke, good point. The gentleman on the sign is the first person I've seen who REALLY needs a hands free phone.

Luke Gedeon said...

I could say something about him being a roundhead but I don't suppose anyone these days would get that.

He is a sharp dresser though. Look at his elbows. Hmm... better give him some elbow room.

BTW, Why does this comment box want me to type trogypot? That does not make any more sense than that sign!?!

Robert Hruzek said...

@Luke - Pretending to ride a make-believe horse? OK; I guess I can see that. (Heck; I do that every day!)

Robert Hruzek said...

@Brad - Not bad, Bubba.

Robert Hruzek said...

@Tabetha, Brad, and Luke - I'm tellin' ya; you guys are startin' to freak me out...

And Brad... "... needs a hands free phone!" Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha!

Batman said...

Caution: Mannequin ahead.

Robert Hruzek said...

Hey, Batman! As long as it's not a, y'know, bat! I hate bats. Yuck.

Stacie.Make.Do. said...

To me this sign says "walk this way" ala After the Thin Man or Mel Brooks.

Robert Hruzek said...

I can't help but picture Marty Feldman pulling that one on Gene Wilder in "Young Frankestein" ... :-D

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